Donnerstag, 25. Juni 2009

How all started

I am not gay or even bi, I am turned on by beautiful women and teenage girls. Especially I am turned on by women in pantyhose, particularly shiny suntan or sheer black pantyhose.

In school time, when my classmates started to date girls, I also had a crush on one girl. I always dreamt of telling her my feelings and going home with her. But instead of kissing, hugging and petting - so were my daydreams - the girl would open her drawers, hand me one of her pink panties, a bra, a pantyhose, a minidress and her girls shoes and call on me to dress in her things. I do what girls want, so I would have dressed as she wanted. The rest of the afternoon I would have kissed her pantyhose-clad feet, sucked on her toes and dance for her and her girl friends she had invited. Such were my teenage dreams, of course that did not happen. Instead I bought pantyhose by myself and put them on secretly at home.

When I was about 20, I started to wear sheer black pantyhose with normal pants which were a little bit too short, no socks, and went out into the city. When a girl discovered my pantyhose, she would tell her friends and they would all look and laugh at me. I turned red in my face and got week knees. These were the girls, the boys of my age dated with, and they saw me silly standing there in pantyhose and laughed at me! I felt so humiliated!

* * *

Once I found neon pink spandex leggings in a department store and I bought them. In the restroom I put on black pantyhose, the neon pink leggings over them and then my normal pants and shoes. I boarded a suburb train to go home and sat in an almost empty wagon. Some rows further, vis-à-vis sat two stylish teenage girls, about 18 or 19 years. Slowly I pulled up my pants a bit and soon they discovered my pantyhose and pink gym pants. They giggled, smirked and laughed, put their heads together and whispered, looked at me again and burst out into laughter. I felt so silly! So humiliated! We had a thirty-minute ride together, and all the time they humiliated me with their stares, smirks and whispers. When they realized, that I, with my dumb face, watched them giggling, they laughed even more.

I put one hand in my pocket and started to stroke my silly cock (which had never even seen a girl’s pussy). I don’t know if they realized what I did, but they went on giggling at me. I got closer and closer. And looking at these smirking teenage girls I creamed my panties. I tried to stay as calm as I could, but the expression of ecstasy on my face and my rapid breathing must have betrayed me. The girls again burst out into laughter about me creaming in my pants.

* * *

Now, about many years later, I got bolder and my pants shorter. I was already out in malls and crowded streets wearing short girls’ shorts and shiny shiny pantyhose. I have had many thrilling experiences.
As you have noticed I especially like pantyhose, sheer, shiny, feminine pantyhose… encasing me, emasculating me and almost sticking to my skin, smooth and silky. I also like and wear panties, high heels, mini-skirts and girly tee-shirts, but never without pantyhose.

In the following blog entries I will go on writing about my experiences and adventures in public humiliation in the past. When I have caught up with these accounts I will write about the present happenings. I appreciate any feedback!

Since I am from Germany English is not my mother language, so please excuse any language mistakes! If you want, you even can send me correction suggestions! My email is:


Dienstag, 2. Juni 2009

About me
I am a crossdresser from Germany.
Straight, and totally into female clothing. Especially pantyhose and high heels. And into public humiliation. Because of business reasons I have little possibility to do these things often, though.
But I sometimes cannot help but going to the mall, fully clad in girl's clothes: Short shorts, pantyhose and pink girly teeshirt. No wig, no makeup. Just a sissyboy. The stares. The whispering behind my back. The pointing and giggling. The burning shame. The total humiliation. Posing for giggling teenage girls with camera cellphones. For me there is nothing more humiliating than if in a group of teenage girls someone discovers me, when they whisper among themselves, then all look at me and burst out into laughter.

I just love pantyhose, high heels and girly clothes. Any woman in them looks great, sexy! She turns me on. I want to obey her, lay before her and kiss her shoes. And it's my greatest dream that such a woman would command me to put on girly clothes.

I love to put on pantyhose and high heels since I was 14. First secretly at home. This female stuff felt so sexy on my body. And I felt already humiliated. In my twens I started to go out in public wearing pantyhose and pants which were a little too short, so that watchful persons could catch me and laugh at me.
Now I have more courage. Several times I went to shoe stores and shops where teenage girls buy their stuff and tried on high heel sandals, girls pants, girls teeshirts and dresses. The stares, the giggles, the laugh!

Some rare times I had the courage to go out in public - obviously male - but dressed completely in girly things and I have had fantastic experiences.

Please feel free to emal me: but be aware that I am not gay nor bi, not even "forced-bi". If you are female of course I would love to hear resp. to read your opinion. Maybe we could go out shopping together?